How to Help Someone With Abandonment Issues

Anyone who has been abandoned by a loved one can tell you that it is a painful experience. Whether it is a parent, sibling, or friend, the sense of betrayal and abandonment can have lasting effects. According to psychologists, these effects can manifest themselves in a number of ways, including trust issues, anxiety, and depression. In extreme cases, people may even develop personality disorders. The good news is that there are ways to heal from the hurt of abandonment. If you know someone who is struggling with abandonment issues, here are some things you can do to help.

What are abandonment issues?

Abandonment issues arise when a person has experienced a significant loss or rejection. This can be due to the death of a loved one, divorce, being left behind by a friend or family member, or any other type of loss. For some people, this experience is so traumatic that it leads to long-term psychological effects.

What are the symptoms of abandonment issues?

There are a number of ways in which abandonment issues can manifest themselves. Some common symptoms include:

Trust issues

People with abandonment issues may have trouble trusting others. They may feel like they are always waiting for the other shoe to drop and that everyone is going to leave them eventually. This can make it difficult to form and maintain healthy relationships.


The fear of abandonment can lead to anxiety and panic attacks. This may be triggered by anything from someone canceling plans to a loved one dying.


The sense of loss and betrayal associated with abandonment can lead to depression. This may manifest as feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and despair.

Personality disorders

In extreme cases, abandonment issues can lead to the development of personality disorders such as borderline personality disorder or avoidant personality disorder.

How can you help someone with abandonment issues?

If you know someone who is struggling with abandonment issues, there are a number of things you can do to help. Here are some suggestions:

Be patient

It will take time for the person to heal and learn to trust again. Don’t pressure them into opening up or moving on too quickly.

Be there for them

Let them know that you are there for them and that you will not abandon them. This can be a difficult promise to keep, but it is important to try.

Encourage healthy coping mechanisms

Help the person to find healthy ways to cope with their emotions. This may include exercise, journaling, therapy, or any other activity that helps them to feel better.

Avoid triggering situations

If there are certain situations that trigger the person’s anxiety or depression, try to avoid them if possible. This may mean avoiding certain topics of conversation or avoiding places that remind them of the person who hurt them.

Seek professional help

If the person is struggling to cope, encourage them to seek professional help. This may be in the form of therapy, medication, or both.

Abandonment issues can be difficult to deal with, but there is hope for healing. With patience and support, the person will slowly start to heal and build trust again.

How to deal with your own abandonment issues

If you are struggling with abandonment issues, it is important to seek help. There are a number of ways you can start to deal with your emotions and begin to heal. Here are some suggestions:

  • Seek professional help: This may be in the form of therapy, medication, or both.
  • Find healthy coping mechanisms: Exercise, journaling, and other forms of self-care can be helpful in managing your emotions.
  • Avoid triggering situations: If there are certain people or places that trigger your anxiety or depression, try to avoid them if possible.
  • Be patient with yourself: Healing takes time. Don’t expect to feel better overnight. Allow yourself the time and space to grieve and heal at your own pace.

If you are struggling with abandonment issues, know that you are not alone. There is help available and you can overcome this difficult obstacle.